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Welcome to my Blog. A place that encourages Zen with a little mix of Fiesty!

Discover who You really are

Discover who You are, not what Others want you to be.

illustrations by wisdomquotes&stories

 It is never easy regardless of your age to start over again. Fear is fear no matter the form in which it presents itself and anxiety doesn't stay too far behind either. If we are lucky though in our life time we will go through many amazing changes.

Such was the case for me the time I decided to go to dinner alone. I'm not talking about grabbing a pizza and soda. I'm talking about walking into a fairly nice restaurant and asking for a table for one. Waiting to be seated, being walked over, settling down and when your all cozy asking the waiter/waitress to bring over your favorite drink along with the menu. "Will you be dining alone? Yes. Ok, I'll be back in a moment, thank you."

At first I must admit I was self conscious of others looking at me and wondering why I was alone but then I thought "who cares?" I began to relax and really enjoy my drink. I looked at the menu carefully and ordered something semi new within reason of course I mean who the heck wants a tummy ache for crying out loud. As the waitress took my order we smiled and exchanged lite conversation and as she walked away I kept smiling in gratitude. I am here, this is fun, I am alone but I am not lonely.

While I waited for my dinner to arrive I read a magazine something I hadn't done in a while because I was always rushing. I turned the pages slowly, took in every picture and every word and still that smile stayed on my face. The music played softly in the background, families laughed, kids were being fed by their moms, couples held hands and chatted. My dinner finally arrived.

illustrations by quoteaddicts.com

I had pan seared Salmon. It had a few other things with it but it's been four years can't recall whole plate but I can tell you that it was one of the best dates I've ever had. No stress about the conversation topics, not rushing through my food but instead savoring every forkful and really being in the moment. Looking at every bite, taking in every scent of what was presented to me on that plate. Grateful. To top things off I ordered Raspberry Cheesecake! Amazing so soft and fluffy and thick and rich and creamy all in one.

Once I was ready to leave and asked for my check, I took a long look around my surroundings and thought...Alone time is priceless.

I discovered that:
-fear is not always your enemy but just a cautious friend
-loss is never easy but sometimes totally neccesary and even freeing
-who You woke up being doesn't have to be the same person you put to bed
-if your so called loved ones don't see your potential then they are not really seeing you
-time moves, wounds heal and authentic love is forever
-every moment is truly filled with a chance to move in another direction
-forever is only as long as you want it to be

illustration by quotes

Four years and tons of alone time later I still look back on that day and smile a grand smile. I believe it should be a requirement of us all to invest in some time alone with ourselves. Time to do and be only for and about us. What we want, what we like, what we think and what we feel. Time to Discover who we really are.

Especially parents, we are almost expected to believe we are suppose to sacrifice ourselves for our families, for our children but No! There is no need to sacrifice just a desire to find a workable balance. It isn't about having it all it is about working with what you currently have and aiming towards something better if that is indeed your goal.

Discover who you really are you are your greatest investment.

What has been your greatest discovery about yourself?

Always stress free xo,
Mari

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